Raising Them Right
The goal of Christian parenting is not your child’s success. It is their surrender. Before it can flow through you, it has to happen to you. Three actions from Deuteronomy 6 that change the way you raise your kids.
Your Kids Are Being Discipled. The Question Is Toward What.
The church gets roughly 40 hours with your children per year. You get 3,000. That number is not meant to produce guilt. It is meant to produce clarity. Valor loves your kids and invests in them every Sunday. But no church can replace a parent. The primary instrument God has chosen for discipleship is not a building or a program. It is a mom and a dad.
The first action is to set the standard yourself. Moses does not start with the children. He starts with the parents. Love the Lord your God with all your heart. Your children are not just watching what you say about Jesus. They are watching what you do with him when no one else is looking. Before godly parenting can happen through you, it has to happen to you.
The second action is to sharpen with repetition. The Hebrew word behind teach them diligently is shenan, the same motion as drawing a blade against a whetstone, again and again. Discipleship at home is not a curriculum. It is a posture. When a siren passes, you pray. When the bank account is low, what comes out of you is what your children see.
The third action is surrender. After pointing to responsibility, Justin holds out something most parents are starving for: permission to let go. You plant. You cultivate. God determines the harvest. He loves your children more than you do. Your mistakes, and theirs, are not beyond the cross.
A new church plant in NW Arvada.
Sundays at 10a at Excel Academy. Expository preaching, real community, a clear next step.
Go deeper with this message all week.
Seven days of Scripture, reflection, and prayer drawn from this sermon. One a day. Read it in five minutes. Carry it the rest of the day.
It Starts With You
Deuteronomy 6:5
Moses does not open with rules for children. He opens with a call to parents. Before you can shape your children’s faith, your own faith has to be real. Not perfect. Genuinely oriented toward God. Your kids are watching your Tuesday morning, not your Sunday performance.
Prayer
Lord, let my faith be something my kids can see. Not a performance, but a life that belongs to you.
Heart Means Direction
Deuteronomy 6:6
The Hebrew word for heart is not about feelings. It means the will, the direction, the seat of identity and commitment. To love God with all your heart means he is the orientation of your life. Your children absorb what you are actually oriented toward.
Prayer
Lord, make you the direction of my life, not just the background of it.
Sharpen the Blade
Deuteronomy 6:7
The Hebrew word shenan means to sharpen, like drawing a blade across a stone again and again. Discipleship at home is not a curriculum. It is repetition. It is praying out loud when a siren passes. It is pointing to God’s goodness in a sunset. Repetition gets things into the bones.
Prayer
Lord, make me intentional in the ordinary moments. Help me see them as chances to press truth into my children.
The Texture of Tuesday
Psalm 78:4-7
The most important moments in your child’s spiritual formation will not happen on a stage. They will happen at the dinner table, in the car, at bedtime. The mundane moments are the classroom. You do not need a curriculum. You need eyes that see every ordinary moment.
Prayer
Lord, help me see Tuesday as sacred. Show me the moments I am missing and give me the presence to use them.
Culture Before Rules
Ephesians 6:4
Paul says bring your children up in the nurture and instruction of the Lord. The order matters. Culture comes first. You build an environment where Christ is normal, then you teach the details. Fish need water before swimming lessons. Start with atmosphere.
Prayer
Lord, help me build a home where you feel normal, close, and good. Not distant or demanding.
Same at Home
Luke 11:39
The number one common denominator in kids who walk away from faith is that their parent was different on the platform than they were at home. Your children do not need you to be a perfect Christian. They need you to be the same Christian. Connect the altar and the porch.
Prayer
Lord, make me the same person at home that I am at church. Let there be no gap between what I confess and how I live.
Surrender
Psalm 127:1
You do the shaping. God does the saving. This is not permission to disengage. It is a gift. You are not your child’s savior. You cannot be. But God loves them more than you do, and he is pursuing them even when you are not in the room. Plant the seeds. Trust the harvest.
Prayer
Lord, I release my children to you. Remind me that your grip on them is stronger than my fear.
For your small group, family, or personal reflection.
- The church gets 40 hours with your children per year. You get 3,000. How does that number change the way you think about your role as a discipler?
- Moses starts with the parents before saying a word about the children. What does it mean for your faith to happen to you before it can flow through you?
- The word shenan means to sharpen a blade through repetition. How does understanding discipleship as constant, repetitive sharpening change your approach at home?
- If your kids were in a separate room and someone asked them honest questions about your faith and character, what do you think they would say?
- Justin separates creating a culture of Christianity from teaching rules. What is the difference practically, and what does a culture of faith actually look like in a home?
- The sermon addresses parents whose children have walked away from the Lord. How do you hold both responsibility and surrender at the same time?
- For single parents, grandparents, or others in non-traditional households: how does this passage speak to your specific situation?
Want to work through these with others? Small groups at Valor meet throughout the week. Find a Group
WATCH MORE
A new message every Sunday.
Subscribe to the Valor Church YouTube channel and never miss one.
JOIN US SUNDAY
Sundays at 10a in NW Arvada.
Excel Academy, 11500 W 84th Ave. Come as you are. A friendly face will save you a seat.
Arvada, CO 80005
720-507-9246
Arvada, CO 80005
720-507-9246